FWB Texting Rules: What Should and Shouldn’t You Do?

JAN 30, 2023 AT 10:27 AM


For the uninitiated, FWB means “friends with benefits”. There are certainly perks to being in a relationship without the usual commitment. It can be freeing for you and your partner. You get to experiment with your wants and likes in your youth without leaving anyone feeling betrayed or unsatisfied.

So, when you’re texting your FWB, what should and shouldn’t you do? Let us take you through some of the top FWB texting rules so you can keep this casual relationship going without problems.


FWB rules

Many FWB texting rules will relate to the often-unspoken rules of being FWB with someone. So, let’s start there.

Be honest about what you’re looking for

First off, for any FWB relationship to work, you need to be open and honest with each other about what you are looking for in an FWB relationship. If you’re both on the same page, you will find that this arrangement will yield more pros than cons.

The same goes for texting rules. If you are not one for clingy texters, voice your concern. If you don’t mind, tell your partner anyway. Full clarity is the best way forward.

Be honest about what you’re comfortable and not comfortable with

Whilst it’s important to let your partner know what you are looking for, they must also know your boundaries. This is the only way you can avoid being in situations where you feel uncomfortable. For example, if your pet peeve is talking about past traumas over text, then let your partner know.

One of the perks of FWB is that you don’t have to be as honest with your partner as you would in normal relationships for it to work out. So if there are things you are not ready to share just yet, don’t share them. And your partner should know not to push you for answers either.

Respect each other’s boundaries

Now that you’ve laid down the ground rules for your FWB relationship, the next step is to respect them. Remember the purpose of an FWB relationship is to love without commitment, and to have some fun while you can! So, keep it at that. Don’t expect something from your FWB that you know they wouldn’t do or be comfortable doing.

If you find that you are expecting more from your FWB, or you are doing more than you would for an FWB, then you should step back and consider whether or not you have invested more feelings in this relationship than you should.

FWB texting rules

So, now that we’re all on the same page about how FWB should act in a casual relationship, let’s move on to some FWB texting rules.

Keep each other on the same page

As always, you have to know what your partner is looking for and comfortable with, and vice versa in an FWB relationship. Whether physically or over text, it is important that both of you are on the same page.

Don’t overthink their words

This might be easier said than done, but once you have been open and honest with each other about your wants and needs, you are less likely to overthink your FWB’s words over text.

Keep the conversation light and fun

Many people who choose to be FWB with others want to avoid the emotional baggage that comes with a fully committed relationship. Maybe they are not ready to be emotionally honest with another person, maybe it’s something else that’s stopping them. Either way, it is not a problem for you, their FWB, to worry about. So, just keep the conversation light and easy for both of you, and your FWB relationship will work out fine.

However, if your partner gets a little emotional over text and you are prepared to deal with it, then by all means do. After all, FWB relationships work only if both parties are open with each other and agree to do the same thing. If you’re not comfortable or simply don’t want to deal with other people’s emotions, then simply let your FWB know that this is not what you were looking for.

Don’t be afraid to be flirty

If you don’t know how to start a conversation with your FWB, or you feel the conversation is getting a little dull, don’t be afraid to be flirty to get the flow of the convo going again. After all, you’re both in it for the fun.

Respect your FWB’s boundaries

You should never pressure your FWB into doing something they are not comfortable with, whether over text or in person. To avoid this, the key is to talk things out with each other. Set some ground rules and let each other know absolutely everything you are comfortable with and not comfortable with. This way you are guaranteed a good time with your FWB.

How to deal with awkward silences

If the conversation seems a little dull, and you’re not sure how you should skip over this awkward silence, tell your FWB! The key to a successful FWB relationship is to be open and communicate with each other. So, if you’re out of things to say, let your partner know. Who knows? They might be able to spice the conversation up and turn the awkward situation around.

Never share explicit content from your FWB without their permission

If you receive any explicit photos or videos from your FWB, or your conversation simply got heated, then it's best to keep these between the two of you. If your partner is okay with you sharing these with other people, they would have voiced their wishes from the beginning.

It’s always better to assume that they want to keep things private. If you want to share anything, just ask. Communication is key in this relationship.

It's okay if you don’t talk every day

It’s okay if you don’t talk to your FWB every day. Texting works differently with everyone and with every couple. Sometimes you might find the conversation just keep going on its own. Sometimes the conversation might die naturally on its own.

Sometimes you might not get a reply from your partner, and it’s important to not overthink it. If it bothers you that they didn’t reply, you should be open with them and talk to them about what you want out of this FWB arrangement, and how you expect them to fulfill this want to see if they are willing to do so in this relationship.

If they aren’t prepared to do what you need from an FWB relationship, it’s always okay to move on.

Don’t take them for granted

It’s easy to fall into the trap of taking your FWB for granted. After all, if you’re not technically dating, you know what you want from your partner and vice versa, so why should you pay any more thought to how they feel? Unfortunately, this line of thinking is what brings a lot of FWB relationships to their ends.

It’s a fine balance between respecting your partner, knowing what they want and what you can give, and taking them for granted. You need to show that you are putting in the effort to interact with them and please them, as much as they should show you the same. If you made plans to hang out together, respect these plans and show up.

If you agreed on a time to text them or talk to them, respect this time and don’t cancel on the spot without a valid reason. It’s important to still treat your FWB like a human being and to remember this is a give-and-take relationship, so you shouldn’t just be taking from your partner without giving back.

We hope this has helped you with your FWB. Remember, stay safe and have fun!