Guy Wants Me to Plan the Date – Why? And What to Do?

NOV 29, 2022 AT 01:35 AM


I know, I know, this rarely happens, but what if a guy actually tells you to plan the next date? What will you do? What will you be thinking at that time? You see, traditionally, men take up the leadership role, and plan the dates. Rarely do we find a man asking a woman to plan a date, but it can happen. Read on to find out the reasons why a man can ask you to plan a date, and what you should actually do.

Dating in the 21st century is like playing a game of chess. You do not want to rush, but you are excited to see where the next move takes you. Is it a checkmate to the wedding bells, or another round of failed trials? All in all, the excitement gets to us.


Reasons why a guy might tell you to plan a date

First and foremost, we should all agree that this might get you by surprise. Men are known for taking the lead and asking a beautiful girl out on a date, whether romantic or casual. It is a man’s thing. That’s how we all found it, well, and we rhymed with it.

Starting on the right foot, one of the reasons he has asked you to plan a date is because he wants to know you, to know the creative side of his soon-to-be partner. Are you the type that will plan for a carnival sort of thing or will you opt to have a quiet picnic by the river? Will you go for the dinner type of date, or will you take him on a road trip to wherever? The type of date that you will choose will show him what setting you are comfortable with.

Some may say that the guy is blatantly lazy and does not want to do the dirty work of finding a nice romantic getaway for the two of you. You see, some people prefer to do the bare minimum, but expect a miraculous amount of output. If this guy is this type, then, be rest assured that once you get the ball rolling, you might not go on dates for a long while.

Some guys may ask the girl to plan a date if he is not creative, outgoing or he is more of an indoor person. Introverts are not so good with events and socializing, in fact, being out saps all the energy in them. If this is your guy, it is okay for you to help him plan a date. Introverts prefer an indoor setting in areas without lots of people. They may be nervous when they go out, so something like a homemade dinner might end up being their favorite date.

Another not-so-good reason why a guy may tell you to plan a date is that he is shy to ask you about your preferences, or, he is not quite sure if you liked the previous date he planned for you. Take this for an example; imagine a guy takes his girlfriend to a concert, but she seems bored and not enjoying the music, the guy will feel guilty and might not volunteer to plan the next one.

No one wants to jeopardize the happiness of their mate due to their personal preferences. At this point, it is okay to understand the guy and talk about your likes when it comes to dates, and how you can spend time together.

Another debatable reason could be that the guy is not as committed to the relationship as you would love him to be. You see, commitment is a personal choice, you cannot force someone to be committed to you. If this is a deal breaker to you, it is okay to call it quits.

What to do?

Now that you are the event organizer of the date, the first thing you should do is to take into account what your partner looks for on a date. Is it beautiful scenery? Is it a scrumptious five-course dinner? Is a visit to the zoo? What makes him happy and alive? What will he enjoy doing? When you get answers to this, you have solved the issue by 50%.

Next is to come up with ideas that will incorporate your guy’s likes and your likes. This is especially vital if you two have totally different preferences. Come up with ideas that will excite you both, so that you two will enjoy whatever it is you have opted for. This might be the hardest part, but honestly, finding a middle ground will be very beneficial

Ensure that you showcase confidence in your choices. Remember, this is a very crucial part of your love life, it might be the best thing that has ever happened to both of you. Now that you have the template of the date, it is time to actualize it.

In the world of dating, asking planning a date is a big step. It is even harder when you are trying to plan a date with someone you barely know. But here is the thing: guys want girls who are interesting, challenging, spontaneous, and passionate about life, not just some plain Jane that sits in the corner reading another romance novel on her Kindle. Take it as a challenge!

Where to start

1) Venue

Look for a charming venue, remember, the setting will determine the activities that you will do. If you opt for an outdoor setting, ensure to check the weather forecast to align yourself with appropriate clothing. For an indoor setting, ensure to look for somewhere with good ambiance, and privacy levels of your choice, and also factor in the noise levels of the place.

2) Food                                                     

You need to decide on what you two will eat, whether you will carry some snacks or order a take-out meal, or whether you will dine in a restaurant. You will need to ask your guy if he has any allergies or food aversions so that you eliminate those from your plan.

3) Activities

The activities will be largely dependent on the venue you opted for. This is where your creativity will be tested. If you chose an indoor setting, you can go for laid-back activities like word games or board games, get some time to chill out and talk and get to know who he is and what he likes or dislikes. This will give you a chance to also let him know you are well.

If you opt for an outdoor setting, you can go for a wild picnic, a concert, or even a road trip. Activities for outdoor settings are spontaneous and more open to change throughout the day depending on how the day is turning out to be.

The bottom line

When it comes to planning a date with a guy, there can be endless possibilities. Be confident with your choice for the date, go out there and enjoy yourself, have fun, make memories, laugh, and be silly, it is all part of the date. By being easygoing, you open endless opportunities of having a great time with someone you might end up with for the rest of your life.

It is okay to question the ulterior motives of this guy, and why he wants you to plan the date, but at the end of it, do not lose yourself by trying to look for every negative thing in this guy, you will miss out on the fun of being there at that moment.  

Take it easy, put all the factors we have told you into consideration, and plan for a date that both of you will enjoy. Go have fun, make memories, take a picture or two, and laugh a little. It is just a date, if you can, go ahead and plan it to the best of your ability- you do not have to be perfect- but give it your all. You will be proud of yourself and you might unravel a side of you that you never knew.