He Texted Me a Week after the First Date - Why? And What to Do?

DEC 30, 2022 AT 08:18 AM


When it comes to relationships, especially the stage when you only start building your relationship, you should know how guys react. Girls always want to get a positive reaction right after the date. They come home and never let their phone away always keeping it in their pocket or just in their hands.

Guys are much more relaxed. They don’t know they need to react somehow. And they don’t know how the relationship works. They may just forget to text or call you and eventually go to their job for a week before they remember about you. Is this OK? Not for you, obviously. But this is just a conventional thing girls need to cope with.


Let’s see why a guy doesn’t text you or texts you after a week!

Why don’t guys text girls after the first date?

There are many reasons but the fact is that over half of men won’t text or call the girl right after their date. There is the other half, of course, and they will find some excuse to text you something like “Are you at home already?” or “How was your trip in a taxi?”

But it’s still pretty common for guys to ignore you for some days after the first date. We’ve asked some psychologists and found some possible reasons for such behavior.

Here’s what specialists say:

  • men don’t feel like they are obliged to give any kind of feedback, so they just don’t care;
  • men don’t care about your reaction after the first date, so they think you don’t care, too;
  • guys may feel too shy to text you after the first date, they may just be afraid to get some bad response;
  • some men will wait for quite a long before they text or call you;
  • a lot of guys prefer that girls call them after the date and ask for another date which is pretty weird.

So, now you see that it’s not about the attitude toward you, it’s all about the mentality of boys. In most cases, they won’t text you for a couple of days after the first date and you will think “Oh, okay, he didn’t like me, so I need to move on”. But right at this moment, he will send you a message, something like: “Hey! What about a walk in the park today in the evening” or “Do you like pizza? I can come to you in the evening with two of them on your choice”.

Is it OK if a guy texts you a week after the first date?

Yes, it’s absolutely OK unless you’ve arranged that you would get in touch earlier. If the guy is really interested in you, he may be just shy to text you, so if he doesn’t call or text you within a week after the first date, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you.

Guys are different. They concentrate on one thing at a time while girls can hold hundreds of things in their heads simultaneously thinking about all of them. So, after a Sunday date, this guy probably went to work and started thinking about his work tasks. On Friday he had a beer with friends and remembered about his wonderful date.

If he doesn’t text you within 7 days, you may forget about him, or at least you may text him to ask what was wrong. But if he texts you within a week, this should be considered OK.

What should you answer if a guy texts you a week after the first date?

Well, it highly depends on whether you want to be with this guy or don’t. The best answer will be the one that shows that you expected to get his message earlier but are still interested in dating him.

Something like: “You haven’t texted for so long, so I have some plans on the weekend. But let’s arrange the time – maybe I can make it”.

If you aren’t interested in this guy, just tell him that you waited for his call for some days and now you have other plans for your free time.

Your answer shouldn’t be too rude, but it should still show a guy that he wasn’t completely good with you.

To sum up, it’s OK if a guy doesn’t text you for a week after the first date and then asks you out again. Guys think differently than girls do, so just put up with it or try to show your boyfriend that you want an immediate reaction from him.